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Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Just Say No

Do you ever get stuck in situations where people ask you to do things and without really thinking about it you just blurt out "Yes." Then, you can't go back and answer differently and sometimes after the first "yes" 5 additional "yes" answers just fly out too.

No?? Good for you.

I seem to do this all the time. It's like I can't help it. There is something seriously wrong with me. (Well, I think we established long ago that was the case, so just add this to the list.)

"Can you help with this project?" Yes.

"Can you take care of my kids?"Yes.

"Want to volunteer for this?" Yes.

"Can you make 4 dozen cupcakes and bring by in the morning?" Yes.

"Mom, can you wipe my bum?" Yes.

"Will you donate for my sister's best friend's cousin's brother's school funraiser? The money goes to help the school and the children learn infinite wisdom and knowledge to help them be productive members of society?" Yes. Absolutely Yes.

"What ideas do you have for this fundraiser?" Blah, blah, blah. "Great. Will you do them all and then when you finish I will add more?" Yes.

I answered a big, fat "YES" to heading the silent auction and raffle for Mini #1's Spring Fling Carnival fundraiser.

This, just like the "Room Mom" task turned out to be a much bigger, more time consuming, and stressful job than I thought it would be.

It is like a snowball effect...I say "yes" to a certain task, then I say "yes" again, I get anxiety about the whole thing because I want it to be perfect, then I obsess and work my bum off to get it finished while perhaps venting some frustrations or obstacles once or twice to my BFF or Mr. and then I'm always happy with how it finally turns out and then say "yes" again as soon as someone wants me to do something else. Saga continues.

There is 4 weeks left to the "big day" and just when I think that I have the big things check off my list, 254 more pop in to my head or someone gives me a list. Then, there are several details and little things that can't be done until closer to the day.

My dear blog friend, Jillian has written more than once about how she has perfected the "no" in the Just Say No campaign against unnecessary and incessant volunteering.

I need to take lessons from her.

Perhaps I should see a doctor. Surely there must be a magical, happy little pill that can assist me with this small problem.

I need to finish up some flyers for the raffle before I take Mini #1 to school this morning. Ahhhh.

Happy Tuesday.

8 comments:

  1. I have this same problem. I too am seeking treatment:)

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  2. Yes, I find that I'm suffering more and more from the "Yes" syndrome. I mean, how the heck did I become the chair of the Public Affairs committee in Junior League? Oh, yeah, I didn't say no. ;)

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  3. Oh I am totally putting my friends in this situation this weekend. We need help to clean the new house since it's been sitting empty for awhile. It would take us a million years to do on our own... They all say, "Just tell me when & where" and I wonder if they mean it... so I quietly say something like, "Well if you have extra time... if you want... you totally don't have to..."
    But apparently even when you're uber-nice about it, it's still hard to say 'no' to a friend who needs your help!!

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  4. In the last six months, I have made major progress in my saying-no skills and let me tell you, it feels fabulous.

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  5. I too have a hard time saying "No." But it is getting easier. I am now at the place where I can say, "Of course.... but only if I have a co-chair!"

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  6. I did the room mom thing when I was a SAHM and it was no biggie. I did it last year and worked full time. Never again!!

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  7. Oh Dear Girl, I can so relate! I always think, how do I get myself into these things? I distinctly recall saying no a dozen times. Then end up having to do them anyways. Let me know if you take lessons and they work. Then will you give some to me, please??? (You can say no to that...)
    Kate

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