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Monday, November 16, 2009

What Does "Don't Tell Anyone" REALLY Mean?

My lovely, witty, and SMART friends, I have a question for you.

What does "Don't tell anyone" really mean?

Something happened to Mr. Molly Lou's brother and apparently he said "don't tell anyone," but didn't tell their sister that.

His sister emailed me yesterday and mentioned this situation and asked me to help. I had no idea what she was talking about so I called. She was asking me when I had last talked to Mr. Molly Lou and then explained the situation.

I started defending Mr. Molly Lou to the sister saying I was sure he didn't know. I had been with him all day the day before, etc. I feel horrible about this and called Mr. Molly Lou to discuss with him and see what his plan of action/how we could help his brother.

He replies "I did know. He called me, but asked me not to tell anyone."


Now, let me backtrack just a bit. I have known the siblings since they were young teenagers and we all get along really well. Now, if a friend were to tell me this, I would certainly keep that in confidence, but would tell my husband. More from the standpoint of needing his assistance and thoughts on how to help, etc.

If a friend specifically asked me not to tell my husband, I would certainly do that.

My feelings are hurt that he didn't tell me, I'm embarassed that his sister was sure I knew and I defended Mr. Molly Lou that he didn't know and then it was just me. I am also mad because I feel that I should have known this. I could have helped even behind the scenes. I would have offered some suggestions for Mr. Molly Lou such as he should have left my parents house where we were staying for the night to be with his brother.

So, where is the line drawn on this question? ?Would you tell your spouse?

Have a great day!


Yesterday, I forgot to name the winner of the Holiday Card Set giveaway. Be sure to check out our Holiday 2009 page for our entire collection of holiday cards and gifts.

Congratulations to entry #4, Headbands and Handbags! You should hop over and check her out...she is fabulously adorable.

From her entry, she chose the Words of Christmas card set (only in her entry, it was phrased"tree word one" :)) and once she sends me her address, a set will be on the way to her. I hope she loves these cards...they are really neat and even better in person. Would also make a perfect hostess gift this season.

Thanks to all who entered. A new Birthday Month Giveaway will be up tomorrow.


  1. I would tell my husband. I have to agree with you. It is hard to say since I don't know the exact situation but I typically tell my husband everything. And I am just not that good at keeping secrets anyways!

  2. I tell my husband pretty much everything. I say pretty much because I'm sure I don't tell him what I eat for lunch every day, etc. ;) But when it comes to things like this, we always know. We realize not everyone is like this, though. His mom caught on and just talks to us like we always know everything about each other... I enjoy observing how she talks to her other daughter-in-law, though. It's always informative and she assumes said DIL knows nothing about the current conversation (which is usually true).
    Okay, did any of that make sense? WE tell each other everything, but not everyone does. Guess it really is a personal preference.

    And gosh, what excellent taste your winner has. LOVE those cards. :)

  3. Hmmm...that is a good question. I think it depends on the situation, but in this case it sounds like something needed to be said. I think I would feel the same way you do had I not known. Hopefully everything gets resolved for Mr. Molly Lou's brother!

  4. I think its kind of understood that "don't tell" means don't everyone but your other half, who you are married to and really don't keep secrets from! I'd be mad, too.

  5. Well, I'm not married but I thought spouses were supposed to tell each other everything. I know my parents have always done that.

  6. I totally agree with you...when anyone says "don't tell anyone" I pretty much make a beeline for my husband to share the news. I always thought that significant others are above the "don't tell anyone," right?

  7. "Don't tell anyone" means "except your significant other, of course." I even get offended when B emphasizes not to tell anyone and that he shouldn't be telling me! Of course you should tell your significant other. Grrr. I'm offended for you, sister! ;)

  8. I would tell my husband. Not only that, I think it's wrong for someone to ask or expect you to keep something from your spouse/significant other.

  9. We should DEFINITELY be friends! Thanks so much for your awesome suggestion about the B&B, I really hadn't even considered it but I looove that idea! It might just be a winner for us.

    About the secret thing... hmmm. I tell my husband everything and I assume people know this when they say "don't tell anyone." But now that you mention it, I'm not sure what my husband would do if someone told him not to tell. I'll have to ask him! I don't know the whole situation (the secret and other details) but I think your husband probably really thought he wasn't supposed to tell ANYONE. I'm sure if you explain your reasoning about you being able to help and how it put you in an awkward situation with his sister, he'll agree and will probably tell you these things in the future. I can see why you'd be annoyed with the whole thing. I hope things work out for his brother!

  10. I'm sorry you feel hurt by this! There are two ways to look at it... 1. As a girl, I tell The Boyfriend pretty much everything -- he's my exception to the "don't tell anyone" rule.
    2. Boys don't think like us and maybe he just really didn't think to tell you. I know that might sound bad, but you know guys are from another place.

    I'm sorry you felt hurt and I'm sure Mr. MLG didn't mean to make you feel that way.


How I love comments...thanks for stopping by and sharing what you are thinking. Cheers!

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