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Monday, December 21, 2009

Tensely Relaxed

Apparently, I am a VERY tense person. I guess I could probably tell you that or you could tell by looking at me.

On Saturday, Mr. Molly Lou and I went to have a massage thanks to Molly Lou sister-in-law. She gave us a wonderful Christmas gift and we go to enjoy it just a few days early. Molly Lou sister kept the minis, so we had a few blissful hours of massage and Starbucks together.

Sadly, I only get a massage about once a year or every year and a half. I would love to get them more, but the massage train seems to miss me.

Every time I get a massage, the massage therapist tells me to RELAX about 45 times. They jiggly my arms to try to get me to relax and then keep telling me to "let it all out" or "you need to focus on relaxing. Don't think about anything." This then makes me more TENSE and far from relaxed.

I keep thinking to myself
"you can relax."
"Jiggle your fingers to make them appear relaxed."
"don't flex your legs when they are massaging them...they will know you aren't relaxed."
"oh, I still need to get blah, blah, blah, blah before tonight."
"ooooh, I left all of that laundry in the dryer. Now some are going to be so wrinkly that I will have to redo."
"Relax, relax, this is supposed to be relaxing and you will feel better when you're done."

This goes on and on. Then, what happens???

My hour is over and I feel more tense than I did when I walked in only now I smell all oily and I need another massage.

Let me tell you that Saturday was no different. About 467 times during the hour, we repeated the same scene: He would say "Relax." After he would tell me to relax, each time I would apologize, and each time he would GIGGLE.

I did enjoy it, but finally just gave up and went about with my tense self and thought about all the things I need to do before Christmas and how much I needed that strong cup of coffee.


  1. Oh my goodness this sounds like me. Only... I am SUCH a tense person that I won't even do the massage thing. I'm 100% serious. I'm not a touchy person. My massage-going friends tell me it would help so much but I just can't bring myself to do it. I'm also one of those people who gets annoyed by yoga. Yup, I'm THAT one. :)

  2. Ha! I'm the same way...I think I get weirded out with a stranger having their hands all over me. I'm glad you still enjoyed it!

    Love and hugs,

  3. We are the same person!

    My best friend is a massage therapist, and works on me all the time. She's like my sister; I'm incredibly comfortable with her, and still...I can never relax! She's always shaking me, telling me to "Relax already!"

    Never works. I'm eternally tense.

  4. I'm really tense too...but if someone...okay, anyone, is massaging me, I am putty in their hands.

  5. I have had one massage in my entire life and I was so stressed the entire time I never paid for another one again! Ha!

  6. I worry about them laughing at my bra line fat while lying there or I can't help but do a mental countdown of how many more minutes I have to be there...

    Maybe if we went more often we'd be better at it.

  7. k I get weirded out with a stranger having their hands all over me. I'm glad you still enjoyed it!
    Work from home India


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