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Tuesday, November 2, 2010

The Core

Often when you think of the word core, you think of the inedible center of a fruit such as an apple.
Lately, I have been thinking of my core. When you look up the 567 definitions of the word core, one of them is

core (noun): a basic, essential, or enduring part; the essential meaning; the inmost or most intimate part

Then, I saw in a magazine that I read it defined as
your inner self, including your temperament, life experiences, emotions, passions, and potential.

How fitting! I feel that I have lost part of my core recently. I know I have kind of "fell off the face of the Blogger earth" lately and how much I have missed it.

I have let life get in the way, I have let part of myself go. I took a job a few months ago, why I never really blogged about it, I'm not sure. When I took the job, there were some obstacles and I guess I was nervous on what I would be able to do. I am the director of a preschool now. The school is thriving and my children are happy there and learning so much. I do like it, but some days I am so completely overwhelmed with work, children, housework and chores, church responsibilities, Molly Lou Gifts shop duties, and the list goes on.

There are some days that I cry at the end of the day when Mini #2 won't go to sleep because I am so tired and I also have about 2356 things that I need to do before I can lay my head down.

When I decided to take this job, we were under the impression that Mr. was going to be able to come home and work out of the home office. That would be so great...we could be a family of 4 again every night, we could eat together, read books together before bedtime, play together, and share the nightly routines. There would be another set of hands each night to help bathe, read, play, cook dinner and clean up (his clean up hands have never been stellar, but there would be another set of hands to do something while I cleaned up at least.) That didn't happen and Mr. is on another project that he does enjoy now at the same site, but still away all week for another year.

I feel like as a mother, I immediately shared a part of my core with these two. I want to share my life experiences, passions, and emotions with them to help mold them in to the person that God intends for them to be. Somewhere in the process though, I think I forgot about my core and certainly forgot to grow that and foster my inner self. By doing so, I know I will be a better mom, wife, and friend.
Blogging is a passion because it allows me to be a part of this wonderful community of people that have entered my life for many reasons. I need this...this is an outlet for me and one of such great support and comfort.
You all help me cultivate my seed, my core for the rest of my life.

7 comments:

  1. I, for one, have missed reading you! Please come back... :)

    And congrats on this new job. What an awesome responsibility! Is it at your minis' preschool? I have loved teaching at my boys' school. It is wonderful!

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  2. I have missed you too (although who am I kidding...I am a BAD blogger but I am trying to get better!). :)

    P.S. The minis looked SO ADORABLE for Halloween. TOO cute!

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  3. I am a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad blogger too! I love this post, though! And I miss you!

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  4. Well, hey there stranger!! It was good to hear from you - congratulations on your new job!! I hope all is well with you, hubs, and the minis! I look forward to more posts soon!

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  5. I've missed you! There are those times when we just have so much on our plate that we can't even see straight (let alone blog.) It's normal, and we are all still here for you.

    And congrats on the new job. Hang in there, things will work themselves out.

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  6. Sounds like a great job, but you've definitely got a lot going on. Sometimes the busy-ness of life can get the best of us and make us forget why we're here. Maybe try to build in some you time before bed every day?

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  7. Missed you! I've thought about you frequently but knew you were most likely busy, busy! I hope you can find a nice balance with all that's going on in your life!

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How I love comments...thanks for stopping by and sharing what you are thinking. Cheers!

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